If I crossed your field instead of going around it?

I was in a restaurant once and I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my reliefs to the beat of the music. After just a few songs I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everybody was staring at me... That was when I remembered that I was listening to my iPod.

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I and my wife decided that we don`t want to have children anymore. So anybody who wants one can leave us their phone number and address and we will bring you one.

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A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.”
The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one.” Source: Bangla Jokes