How to handle low scores and poor exam results
The post-result lowness takes much graver tones when one looks at the rising number of suicide rates. To prevent student suicides, there’s a need to understand the mindset behind the act of killing oneself for a thing as insignificant as grades. We spoke to three experts - Dr Jyoti Kapoor Madan, Sr Consultant, Psychiatrist, Paras Hospitals, Gurgaon; Dr Sunil Pawar, Consultant Psychiatrist, Columbia Asia Hospital, Ghaziabad and Jitin Chawla, career counsellor, director, Centre of Career Development. They gave us important insights as to what must be done to tackle the situation of low grades.
If you are one of those seeking help and wanting to deal with post-result depression, you need to keep the following things in mind.
Focus on the bigger picture
We know it’s easier said than done when you are in a grim mindset, but try. Look at your life five years down the lane. If your 10th grades are low, it’s a much small cause of worry because you still have two years to get a better score. Analyze where you went wrong and do not blame your friends, family, study environment or any other factor. They all are insignificant if your will is determined.
However, if your 12th marks are not up to the mark, look beyond the current situation, says Jitin. In an entire universe of uncountable planets, a million stars, innumerable galaxies, measureless number of people and everything infinite, you cannot be worried about a two-digit number. Get over it. Explore what you are actually good at and give it a try.
Open your mind to changes
Both Dr Jyoti and Jitin believe that a student cannot be stuck at one thing. “When you are only 15 to 17 years old, chances are that your choices are mostly parents-decided or peer-pressure-induced. Understand that they can change,” says Dr Jyoti. One must also not be stuck at Delhi or Mumbai, says Jitin. Be open to change, to relocate and life will only have good in store for you.
Give yourself time to recover
Life does not end with bad results, say Dr Jyoti and Dr Sunil. You need not be too harsh on yourself. This period of anxiety and pressure will soon pass. Understand that everyone needs time to handle disappointments. Figure out what you are disappointed with and try to work on that. If it’s your own performance, give yourself another year. A year in an entire life of seventy years isn’t big a deal, is it?
Spit it out
For Dr Sunil, communicating is of utmost importance. “If you are feeling low and guilty about not performing well, never swallow the feelings down. They are better outside your body. Talk to someone you trust,” he says. Or if you do not think that anyone will understand, believe us, at least one person out there will. It could be your teacher, a parent, a sibling or a friend. If you still have doubts about opening to anyone, call up a helpline number.
Read and research
This should, perhaps, have been the first and most important point - do your homework. Choices are many, says Jitin, you just need the right research. If your dream college or the stream you preferred needed a higher score, reconsider your options. Go to career counsellors, take skill-based courses and figure out what other things you are better at. You never know that you may discover that algebra and alphabet where never your things. Maybe, your simpatico is cooking, or let’s say, photography. Or if you could not get through Delhi University cut-offs for B.Com, try BMS, says Jitin. Entrances do not require your CBSE marks to be very high.
However, if you are a parent whose child is slipping into a depressed state post-results, you need to keep the following in mind.
Get over comparison
‘Not everyone can be a topper’ - this cliched line holds much worth if you simply believe in it. May be, the neighbour’s son is indeed excellent but not yours. Accept and own the true skill set of your children and be proud of it. The ‘C’ of comparison is the worst devil and all three experts - Dr Jyoti, Dr Sunil and Jitin - advise against it.
Source: The Times of India
