Communication is one of the foundation blocks of a happy, healthy and safe relationship. A healthy relationship requires a lot of effort, understanding, loyalty, communication and trust from both ends to make things work out. But when communication is strained in a relationship, it can hurt the health of the relationship. In a relationship, it is important to create a space for healthy communication and sharing of emotions. "No one is born a good communicator. They choose to become one. And they choose to keep improving their skills one conversation at a time. It takes one spouse willing to grow their communication skills to create life-giving conversations," wrote Relationship Coach Julia Woods.
Here are a few signs that we may not be communicating well with our partner:
We interrupt: We should listen to understand and interpret, and not just respond. When we end up interrupting the partner when he/she is sharing their feelings with us. That can mean that we are not interested in understanding their perspectives. This can dent a hole in the relationship and make the partner feel that they do not have a safe space for communicating their emotions in the relationship.
You assume: Assumptions can ruin a relationship. One of the biggest mistakes we make in a relationship is making assumptions without clarifying from the other person in the first place. Assumptions can make us take decisions that are irrelevant and harmful to the relationship.
We speak in absolutes: All of us make some rules in the relationship that further decide the patterns. However, in case of conflicts, when we speak in absolutes and determine the patterns based on mistakes made by the partner, it can affect the relationship.
We exaggerate: Exaggeration is a way of gaining control and trying to manipulate the partner. When we try to prove the point, we often exaggerate to demean the partner. This is a harmful and toxic pattern in a relationship.
We complain: Instead of complaining, we should try to make requests to the partner and seek their thoughts and decisions. When we try to complain too often, it can make us feel frustrated and drained in the relationship.
Source: Hindustan Times