In a relationship, it is important to address and de-escalate a conflict to stop it from going out of control. "The secret to de-escalation of conflict is to recognise and attend to the vulnerable spots in ways that don’t engage in negativity, shame, blame, or criticism," wrote Therapist Jordan Dann. Here are a few ways to de-escalate a conflict.
Connection and repair are not possible when the people are activated and dysregulated. It is important to take a break and come back to it later.
We need to pause to help the nervous system regulate. Taking deep breaths and going to another room to calm down can help.
We need to stop the me versus you thinking. A relationship requires two people to work as a team and solve things together.
When we are responsible for escalating the conflict, we should take responsibility for it and work on addressing it.
We should zoom out and get a clear picture of the main reason for the fight and try to solve things from the core.
Source: Hindustan Times