Mashrafe Mortaza is used to having a question mark hang uneasily over his future. It has long been a running theme, but a renewed bout of speculation - coming not long after he led Bangladesh to a first-ever ICC semi-final - has left even the usually calm Mashrafe slightly incensed. Despite some good times with the ball, he has still had to endure this extra bit of outside pressure for nearly a year now.
"After the first two matches of almost every series, the calls come for my removal," Mashrafe told ESPNcricinfo soon after arriving home from England. "It is tough to play in this way. I know that after two matches in a series, I will hear things about my departure. It is a challenge that I have taken on.
"For example, in Ireland in May, I gave away 58 runs in 6.3 overs against New Zealand. I felt I had a lack of bowling in my system so the next day I bowled more in the nets and then again bowled in front of the head coach and bowling coach Courtney Walsh. I spoke to both of them, and then through bowling to just the wicketkeeper [in nets], I corrected my problems. I am doing as much as possible but it becomes hard to play cricket in this climate."
Much of this doubting comes from an influential section within the Bangladesh Cricket Board (BCB), though Mashrafe is not pointing fingers. There have been murmurs questioning his place in the team ever since the World T20 last year, and they persisted after the Champions Trophy this year. Interestingly, his status among fans as the most popular figure in Bangladesh cricket remains in place and most of the media hasn't yet begun to call his captaincy or place in question. The general belief in Bangladesh is that while Mashrafe the bowler has waned in his pace, he is still essential to the team's ODI plans.
These questions usually centre around his bowling and fielding lapses but those are few and far between. The loss of pace has been compensated by his growing nous. He has proved time and again that he is the only bowler at ease with the new ball, and though he doesn't possess the pace of Taskin Ahmed or Rubel Hossain or the variation of a Mustafizur Rahman, Mashrafe can still move the ball. The numbers back him too.
He is Bangladesh's second-highest wicket-taker since the 2015 World Cup, having picked up 42 wickets at an average under 30 and economy rate just under five.
What gets most interesting is when you look at his numbers during the period he recognised as the "pressure period". Since the Afghanistan ODI series at home in September 2016, he has been the team's highest wicket-taker with 28 wickets at 28.89. If he is criticised for being too loose, his economy rate answers that question too. Mashrafe is one of the two Bangladesh bowlers during this period to have conceded runs at less than five an over (having played a minimum of five games).
His captaincy too has been a vital aspect of Bangladesh's progress. Off the field, he has shown significant man-management skills to eke out the best from talented but inconsistent individuals. Under Mashrafe and coach Chandika Hathurusingha, many have found a voice on and off the field, and have been willing to express themselves.
When Mashrafe is out on the field, he takes decisions based on his gut, even though sometimes the calls are not the most popular. One case in point was when he brought on Mosaddek Hossain at a crucial time of the New Zealand innings during their make-or-break Champions Trophy game.
"In the second drinks break, I went out to change my spike," Mashrafe explained. "I discussed with the coach if we can bring a spinner for an over or two. Mosaddek had troubled [Jimmy] Neesham and [Corey] Anderson previously, so after Taskin removed Ross Taylor, I thought it was a good time to bring him into the attack.
"There were some who said it wasn't a great idea. There was risk involved but I went with my gut feeling. Mosaddek gave away five runs in that over but I still felt he can be used for another over."
The part-timer went on to take three key wickets as New Zealand slid from a strong position.
Though Shakib Al Hasan and Mahmudullah ultimately were the heroes in the chase, Mashrafe's captaincy had given the team an edge by restricting New Zealand to 265.
But he said that the long-term effects of the constant questioning of senior players' places is the confusion it creates within a dressing room that has several players approaching the peak of their careers.
"I don't think about [the questions]. Plain and simple. It is hard not to, but I don't give it much time or attention. What I fear, however, is that such a thing has the potential of puzzling the dressing room. You will talk about someone's selection when he is not up to the mark in fitness levels or fielding.
"When he is not bowling well you don't even have to talk to the player before dropping him. But sometimes I don't find an issue. I am a player, and I am prone to making mistakes. But when you call for my removal after one or two matches, it makes playing difficult. I don't think about it. I only focus on preparing myself."
Mashrafe can at least think about it rationally now, after years and years of hardships including multiple injuries, several heartbreaks on and off the field and family health issues. It is that more practical side of him that has rubbed off on the Bangladesh team too, especially since he took over as limited-overs captain in 2014.
Having nearly given up the game after the 2011 World Cup, Mashrafe has always seen the last six years as a bonus. He considers himself "firstly a team player, a cricketer and then a captain". But what does he do when the questioning becomes too frequent?
"You asked me the question but you are the one who has to judge me. You are the best judge. There are questions and there can be, about anyone. But if it is a question about someone's cricket, one must think about his performance and fitness before anything else.
"I see that overall I am fine so it becomes a bit painful at times. But I hardly give it time. I only look out for personal attacks or when an environment is being created, which I can pick up on. I am strong in my place, and I know my job is to perform as a player."
Source: ESPNcricinfo