Mother, “How was school today, Patrick?”Patrick, “It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!”Mother, “Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?”Patrick, “What school?”###A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.”The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one.”###Doctor: ‘I’m sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live.’Patient: ‘What do you mean 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks? Doctor: ‘Nine.’