Oliver Hardy: ‘Didn’t you once tell me that you had an uncle?’Stan Laurel: ‘Sure, I’ve got an uncle. Why?’Oliver: ‘Now we’re getting somewhere. Is he living?’Stanley: ‘No. He fell through a trap door and broke his neck.’Oliver: ‘Was he building a house?’Stanley: ‘No, they were hanging him.’###‘My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She’s 97 now and we don`t know where the hell she is.’###The wife’s mother said: ‘When you’re dead, I’ll dance on your grave.’I said: ‘Good. I’m being buried at sea.’